每一次看完《老友記》后，都會(huì)有這樣一些場(chǎng)景和臺(tái)詞在我的腦海中揮之不去。以下是我為大家準(zhǔn)備的老友記的經(jīng)典搞笑臺(tái)詞，希望大家喜歡!

老友記的經(jīng)典搞笑臺(tái)詞(一)

1、Monica: Live together? There have been no signs for that.

“住在一起?可是并沒(méi)有什么預(yù)兆呀?”

Chandler: Me asking is kind of a sign.

“那就讓我的請(qǐng)求作為一種征兆吧?！?/p>

2、Chandler: I love you!

“我愛(ài)你”。

Monica: I love you!

“我也愛(ài)你。”

Chandler: Are you hugging the door right now.

“你現(xiàn)在在緊貼著門(mén)說(shuō)話嗎?”

(Pause)

Monica: No.

“沒(méi)有?！?/p>

Chandler: Yeah-yeah, me neither.

“咳、咳……我也沒(méi)有?！?錢(qián)德勒好可愛(ài)呀。

3、Joey: (To Monica) Okay! Look-look-look, uh, if you’re gonna be moving in with him I feel it’s my responsibility to tell you the truth about him! Okay? He’s a terrible roommate! Terrible! He uh, forgets to umm… Oh-oh he always, he always umm―Oh, who am I kidding! He’s the best roommate ever! (Hugs Chandler.)

“如果你真打算和他一起住，你得清楚這意味著什么。他這個(gè)室友差勁極了，他老忘了……嗯，他總是，他總是……得了吧，他是全世界最好的室友?！?/p>

4、Ross: I’ve known you both a long time, and I’ve never seen either of you one/millionth as happy as you’ve been since you’ve got together. Do you really want to throw that all away over a room? That is so silly. Now wh-what is more important, love or silliness?

“我認(rèn)識(shí)你們這么久，你們?cè)谝黄鸷笊畋纫郧靶腋Ａ艘话偃f(wàn)倍。而現(xiàn)在，你們要為一件破房子的安置把這種幸福拋之腦后嗎?這太蠢了。什么在你生命中是最重要的，是愛(ài)情還是愚蠢?”

5、Joey: This is how much we pay for electric?!!!

Chandler: Uh, yeah.

(Joey runs over and shuts off the lights.)

錢(qián)德勒要搬走了，喬伊才知道電費(fèi)有多貴，喬伊就像個(gè)特別單純的小孩，需要人照顧，能認(rèn)識(shí)兄長(zhǎng)般的錢(qián)德勒，是他最大的幸運(yùn)。

6、Joey: Well, what’s it called?

Chandler: Cups.

錢(qián)德勒為了給喬伊一些錢(qián)又不傷他自尊，創(chuàng)造了一個(gè)全新的cups游戲。(規(guī)則以反 拖拉機(jī) 為基礎(chǔ)，準(zhǔn)則是喬伊有什么牌，什么牌就是大的)

7、Ross: Oh y"know what, girls don"t like it when I start talking about science. Uh, they don"t like it when you correct their grammar.

Chandler: And they don"t like it when you explain why your jokes are funny.

Ross: They don"t like it when you keep asking them if they like you.

羅斯和錢(qián)德勒傳授給喬伊的“拒妞大法”，包括談?wù)摽茖W(xué)，糾正語(yǔ)法，反復(fù)問(wèn)對(duì)方愛(ài)不愛(ài)你，詳細(xì)解釋自己的笑話為什么好笑，當(dāng)然，錢(qián)德勒那句“Ba dum bumb cheshhh!”更為經(jīng)典。女人緣稍差的兄弟們，看好了，不過(guò)要記得反其道而行之，比如談?wù)撐膶W(xué)，混淆語(yǔ)法，絕對(duì)不說(shuō)我愛(ài)你，詳細(xì)解釋自己的笑話為什么無(wú)聊，做到這些，你就可以跟我一樣光棍一輩子了。

8、Phoebe: That"s okay Rachel. I"m not judging you; that"s just who you are. Me. I"m more free y"know? I run like I did when I was a kid, cause that"s the only way it"s fun.

菲比真的是自然率性的典范，絲毫不在乎外人的眼光，跑起來(lái)像青蛙，是因?yàn)檫@是她自己唯一覺(jué)得有趣的跑法，就像這樣怪里怪氣的做人，可能是她唯一覺(jué)得有趣的活法吧。后來(lái)瑞秋也這么跑，則不是源于個(gè)性，而是對(duì)朋友的肯定和支持了。

9、Monica: Mmmm!

瑞秋在 感恩節(jié) 做了個(gè)無(wú)比難吃的怪東西，大家為了怕傷她的心，都極力做出很享受的樣子。

10、Monica: 5 6 7 8!

莫尼卡和羅斯兄妹的超炫組舞，個(gè)人覺(jué)得很具有觀賞性。也凸現(xiàn)了這對(duì)從小打到大的娃娃幸福的一面，那里有相同的回憶，成長(zhǎng)的印記。

11、Joey: No! Year! Happy No Year!

喬伊的午夜之吻計(jì)劃被導(dǎo)演打斷，情不自禁大聲吼了出來(lái)。情圣不愧是情圣，以下是此事相關(guān)對(duì)白：

“那一刻，你的紅唇對(duì)我是不可抵擋的誘惑。”

“那一刻，我也有要吻你的沖動(dòng)?！?/p>

“我那心跳的感覺(jué)持續(xù)到現(xiàn)在還揮散不去，3，2，1?！?/p>

“你不必每次吻我都倒數(shù)計(jì)時(shí)。”

“不，我只是需要一點(diǎn)時(shí)間找回呼吸?！?/p>

12、Chandler: I don’t wanna know what Monica got me. Y’know? I mean, look, I’m sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me，I wanna see the look on Monica’s face when I give her my present, and I’m sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine.

“我不在乎自己的禮物是否比莫尼卡的更好，我知道莫尼卡一定在這方面花了很多心思。當(dāng)我送她禮物時(shí)，我最期待的是她那驚喜而幸福的表情，我想，她送我禮物時(shí)也一樣。所以，千萬(wàn)千萬(wàn)不要再找她的禮物了好嗎?實(shí)實(shí)在在的愛(ài)與驚喜就是最好的禮物，這才是感恩節(jié)的真諦?！?/p>

13、Chandler: Look at us, we’re a couple of couples!

喬伊帶辣妹室友跟錢(qián)德勒夫婦共進(jìn)晚餐，錢(qián)德勒管他們四人叫做一對(duì)一對(duì)。錢(qián)德勒給喬伊錢(qián)付帳，買(mǎi)好酒裝做是喬伊買(mǎi)的，可惜辣妹不喜歡這對(duì)慷慨的夫婦，喬伊只好忍痛重義輕色了。

14、Chandler: If you need money, will you please-please just let me loan you some money?

喬伊窮得停了有線，斷了電話，錢(qián)德勒很誠(chéng)懇地要幫他。

說(shuō)來(lái)慚愧， 畢業(yè) 以后，小可一直十分窘迫，在此謝謝幫助過(guò)我的那些錢(qián)德勒，并期待自己的big break，來(lái)回報(bào)大伙兒。

15、Rachel: Yes, we are very sorry to tell you this, but you, Phoebe, are flaky.

Monic

老友記的經(jīng)典搞笑臺(tái)詞(二)

1、Chandler: All right, there’s a nuclear holocaust, I’m the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?

“如果核爆炸，世界上只剩我一個(gè)男人，你會(huì)愛(ài)我嗎?”

錢(qián)德勒不停地問(wèn)莫尼卡會(huì)不會(huì)愛(ài)他，答案都是否定的。你能想象幾年后他們有那么幸福嗎?

2、Joey: That’s right I stepped up! She’s my friend and she needed help! And if I had too, I’d pee on anyone of you!

喬伊白癡而感人的宣言：“如果你們需要，我可以在你們?nèi)魏稳松砩夏蚰颉！?/p>

3、Ross: I didn’t know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! I didn’t finish the whole letter!

羅斯真的有些小氣，作為男生承擔(dān)這些責(zé)任又怎么了?過(guò)去聽(tīng)他講“on the break”覺(jué)得好玩，現(xiàn)在越來(lái)越覺(jué)得這時(shí)的他可恨了。

4、Mrs. Geller: And the next time you cater for me, there will be nothing but ice in the freezer.

聚會(huì)上人們都喜歡吃莫尼卡做的東西，蓋勒夫人終于承認(rèn)了自己的女兒，說(shuō)下次再也不會(huì)準(zhǔn)備備用食物了。

5、Chandler: Oh, I just wanted to say, Hey!

錢(qián)德勒跑過(guò)好幾條街，跌倒了無(wú)數(shù)次，只是為了跟女孩子說(shuō)一句“hey”?？上菃桃恋呐?，雖然她跟錢(qián)德勒更合適。

還是喜歡做一個(gè)會(huì)氣喘吁吁的說(shuō)“真巧”的男孩，不管我有多老，追著喜歡的女孩跑，永遠(yuǎn)是最美的心跳牽動(dòng)的心跳。

6、Chandler: That I haven"t stopped thinking about her since the moment I met her. That I"m so fantastically, over-the-top, wanna-slit-my-own-throat in love with her, that for every minute of every hour of every day I can"t believe my own damn bad luck that you met her first!!

錢(qián)德勒說(shuō)出對(duì)喬伊女友的真實(shí)感受：“從見(jiàn)到她的第一眼開(kāi)始，我就不可救藥的愛(ài)上了她，我瘋了似的思念她，夢(mèng)寐以求有她相伴左右。每一天每一小時(shí)每一分鐘的每一秒里我都在痛恨自己為什么不能比你早認(rèn)識(shí)她?！?/p>

7、Chandler: Oh, it wasn"t a big deal. I just went to a couple of bookstores, talked to a couple of dealers... called a couple of the author"s grandchildren.

錢(qián)德勒跑了許多家書(shū)店，問(wèn)了許多書(shū)商，又給原作者的后人打了許多電話，才買(mǎi)到了很稀有的書(shū)作為生日禮物，但喬伊只買(mǎi)了一支能看時(shí)間的筆，所以，錢(qián)德勒只好跟喬伊互換了禮物。 越來(lái)越愛(ài)錢(qián)德勒!

8、Ross: No the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before you kissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just would"ve just stepped aside.

錢(qián)德勒如果早跟喬伊坦白自己對(duì)喬伊女友的感受，情況會(huì)好得多。

或者說(shuō)，羅斯早跟錢(qián)德勒說(shuō)這些話，情況就會(huì)好得多。

9、Joey: When that guy was robbing us, and I was locked in the entertainment unit for like six hours, you know what I was doing in there all that time? I was thinking about how I let you down!

“我們家被搶劫的時(shí)候，我被關(guān)在櫥子里，整整六個(gè)小時(shí)，我都在想我會(huì)害你多難過(guò)。”

10、Monica: Fine! Judge all you want to but, married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, livin’ in a box!!

莫尼卡因?yàn)橄群蠛屠聿楦缸蛹s會(huì)受到指責(zé)，然后憤怒的揭短。是呀，六人中沒(méi)有一個(gè)的人生完美，但他們都在快樂(lè)的生活;沒(méi)有一個(gè)沒(méi)犯過(guò)錯(cuò)，但他們都是最善良的。

11、Rachel: Don’t say that I have no sentiment! This is a movie stub from our first date! This is an eggshell from the first time you made me breakfast in bed! This is from the museum from the first time we… were together. Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes, but I keep the things that matter!

瑞秋讓人動(dòng)情的一刻：“不要說(shuō)我沒(méi)有人情味兒。這是我們第一次一起看電影的票根，這是你第一次為我做早餐時(shí)剩的蛋殼，這是我們第一次約會(huì)時(shí)從博物館拿的化石。我可能會(huì)把你們送的禮物退掉，但我會(huì)保留所有我認(rèn)為值得珍藏的東西?！?/p>

12、KATHY: you not being able to talk may make this easier. Listen umm… Listen I don’t wanna be someone who comes between two best friends. I just, I can’t stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and I don’t wanna be the cause of that. So, I don’t think we can see each other anymore. I’m gonna go to my mom’s in Chicago, I’m gonna stay there for awhile. I think this could’ve be something really amazing, but y’know this is probably for the best. Y’know? I’m gonna miss you. Good-bye

凱茜對(duì)箱子里的錢(qián)德勒所說(shuō)的話：“你現(xiàn)在不能說(shuō)話也好，這樣我們的離別也不必那么難受。我不想做影響你們兄弟感情的女人，我沒(méi)法眼睜睜的看著你們?yōu)榱宋一ゲ焕聿?。所以我覺(jué)得我們還是不要再見(jiàn)面了，我會(huì)去芝加哥我媽那調(diào)整一段時(shí)間。我知道我們?cè)谝黄饡?huì)有多么幸福，但現(xiàn)在來(lái)看，分開(kāi)才是最好的結(jié)局。你能理解嗎?我會(huì)想你的。親愛(ài)的再見(jiàn)?！?/p>

13、Phoebe: Yeah. That’s what you really want. Yeah, I don’t want to be the reason you’re unhappy, that would just make me unhappy, and I really don’t want to be the reason I’m unhappy.

菲比放棄了和莫尼卡的餐車，支持她去做大廚。因?yàn)槟鞘悄峥ㄕ嬲胱龅?，委屈莫尼卡就是委屈她自己，菲比不想委屈自己…?/p>

14、Phoebe Sr: I gave up two babies, and I only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terrible it is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret every single day for the rest of your life.

菲比的媽媽對(duì)她說(shuō)：我拋棄過(guò)兩個(gè)孩子，我多希望當(dāng)時(shí)有人能告訴我這是多么糟糕的事情，這使得我以后的日子每一天都在無(wú)盡的悔恨中度過(guò)。

15、Monica: 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3, 5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4, (Rachel starts getting worked up) 2, 2, 4-7, 5-7, 6-7, 7, …7..…7…7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7…(mouths 7)!

無(wú)話不談的老友，錢(qián)德勒的女友當(dāng)晚跑過(guò)來(lái)跟莫尼卡致謝。

16、Ross: I’m having my lunch at this table, here in the middle. I’m having lunch right here, with my good friend Joey, if he’ll sit with me.

羅斯為了好朋友喬伊，在博物館的午餐桌上發(fā)起了反對(duì)階級(jí)歧視運(yùn)動(dòng)。

17、Phoebe: No, I’m really okay with this. Y’know why? ‘Cause look at them, and I made that, so… I know it’s gonna be like a million times harder to give up a baby but, oh my God, it’s gonna feel like a million times better, right?

菲比決定為弟弟和弟妹生孩子。雖然放棄孩子時(shí)會(huì)有十萬(wàn)分的難過(guò)，但看到弟弟弟妹高興的樣子，也會(huì)有十萬(wàn)分的幸福。全世界最偉大的姐姐。

18、Kathy: Acting! Chandler, this is my job! I’m-I’m playing a part in a play! How can you not trust me?!

Chandler: Well, you can understand, given how we started.

凱茜對(duì)錢(qián)德勒說(shuō)你怎么能覺(jué)得我背叛你呢?錢(qián)德說(shuō)那我們又是怎么開(kāi)始的?

難以置信聰明、善良的錢(qián)德勒會(huì)說(shuō)出這么傷人的話。永遠(yuǎn)不要揭愛(ài)人的傷疤，尤其是這傷疤是為你而結(jié)。

19、Joey: Well, suppose until the baby’s born I laid off it. No extra animals would die, you-you’d just be eating my animals.

菲比懷孕后很想吃肉，但素食主義的她很在意殺生。食肉狂人喬伊為了讓她心安，自動(dòng)戒肉直到小孩子出世，把吃肉的機(jī)會(huì)讓給了好朋友。

20、Rachel: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monica’s photo albums, I mean you don’t do that if you’re just in it for two weeks.

這個(gè)女孩花整晚時(shí)間跟你的朋友聊天，問(wèn)你以前的事兒，要你的影集看，你覺(jué)得這是一段短暫情緣的表現(xiàn)嗎?

21、Rachel: It’s okay. Sometimes, things don’t work out the way you’d thought they would.

有時(shí)候，生活不像你想象中那么美好。

得悉羅斯要結(jié)婚，可憐的瑞秋，她總覺(jué)得他們可以分分合合，可一旦沒(méi)有了合的可能，她才感覺(jué)到對(duì)方的重要。

22、Phoebe: So, did shopping make you feel any better about Ross?

購(gòu)物能減輕你對(duì)羅斯的思念嗎?

Rachel: Manhattan does not have enough stores.

美國(guó)的店鋪顯然不夠多。

23、Monica: Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?

“羅斯，你什么時(shí)候開(kāi)始籌備的這場(chǎng)婚禮?”

Ross: I don’t know. A month?

“記不清了，一個(gè)多月前吧?！?/p>

Monica: Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since the first time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. That’s what we did! We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, w. But the most important part is that we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.

“女孩子在五歲的時(shí)候就開(kāi)始幻想她的婚禮了，她們要最完美的婚禮，最理想的地方，更重要的，她們想要一個(gè)真正懂得這場(chǎng)儀式對(duì)她有多大意義的人來(lái)托付終身。”

24、Rachel: Y’know what? No. It’s not over until someone says, I do.

在他們正式結(jié)婚以前，我是不會(huì)放棄的。

25、Minister: Take thee, Emily...

Ross: Take thee, Rachel...